Testifyin' and what not

i'm leavinnn on a jet plane... but not to worry, i will be back next tuesday (if ya cared) :D Jamaica trip #2 tommorow. Not quite excited yet. When I step off the plane, that's when it'll kick in... if the Klonopin has worn off by then

*shrug*

This time I will be writing from abroad... because my mom bought me a laptop as an "your-almost-done-with-your-Masters" present:D

Looking forward to some relaxation on the beach, jetskiing, partying, all of that. Seeing my family. Not really concerned w/ boyfriend #4 right now. I dipped into his email again, and he's there writing to his old woman boo, telling her he misses talking to her and has been calling her like crazy. Rocko said it best:

"You just do you, umma do meee"

Because I am.

I was talking to Pop Pop on the i/m the other day and he pointed out that we (Boyfriend #4 and I) were both wrong for trying to lock down our body parts for each other when we really don't know each other to have that kind of relationship and trust.

*Cue in the soft & pink Wendy Williams music*

That Pop Pop is a wise man. We don't talk as much as we used to anymore, and we live quite far from each other now, however, I appreciate him for all that he's been to me in the time I've known him. Pop Pop is really good at telling people to get it together in a way that is calm and non-judgemental; something a lot of people (that I know) are not very skilled at. This works for me because under my psuedo-tough exterior, I'm quite marshmellow-like. Anywho, Pop Pop, I know you don't really read this as much as you would like to(haha), but thanks. I ♥ you... not in that "I wanna take your clothes off and kiss you in the mouth"-type way, hehee. Yes, even though you are sexy as hell. :D

*End music*

In other events...I'm a lot more calmer about my situation. I cried, prayed on it, and God told me that I am alright.

It's about to be one of those rare moments where my morals and values shine through:

God is real; never let anyone tell you otherwise. If you don't believe in him, well, that's your gripe. I'm not here to judge. However, I do pray that you DO come to know him one day. It's a beautiful thing.

It is my opinion that intuition is God speaking to you. Ever notice how when you don't listen to intuition, things go madly wrong, i.e. click that right there?

Anywho, there was one profound time when God whispered in my ear, and I am so greatful that I knew to listen because it saved my mother's life.

Kick back and grab your cocoa mug ya'll; story time!

When I was 15 (if I recall correctly; it's been soooo long) one morning I was dreaming that my mother was calling out to me. At the time she and my dad had their bed set up downstairs because we were re-doing the house. So, I woke up, went to the top of the stairs and called out "Mom?"

No answer.

So I chalked it up to dreaming; turned around ready to get back in the bed because it was still early, but something said "Go downstairs to your mother."

So I went downstairs to see my mother face down on the ground, with the alarm clock next to her; blood pouring from her mouth. Very scary, but for some reason, I didn't feel a lick of fear (which is very unlike my scaredy-cat ass)

I turned her over and sat her up. She seemed kind of in a daze, but thank God she was alive. I called 9-1-1 and then told my grandmother and sister to come downstairs. 9-1-1 told us to sit her up and put her legs up on a chair because it sounded like she had a stroke.

And that was exactly what happened. My mom was 43 years old at the time, and had a stroke. This is a woman who doesn't drink, or smoke, and was (still is) healthy and a stunning size 4 at age 55. Very reserved, and the opposite of me. The only tell-tale sign that she's my mama is that we look just alike. I'm just the fatter version, hehehehe

Her stroke was more than likely, naw, scratch, lets be honest, was a result of putting up with my father and his shennanigans and being a work-a-holic (because he never kept a steady job). Note to all, when something is draining you and stressing you out, WALK AWAY. walking away is not the same as giving up.

Anywhosit, I'm glad that I listened to the voice of God and went downstairs to see about her, because she probably would have not been here today. And I would probably be even more of a hot mess than I already am :)p

I didn't save her, God did. I don't take any of the credit.

I tell you allllladat to tell you this; if you take a little time to be quiet; to be still when you're thinking over your pressing issues, God will let you know what it is that you need to do.

Last week when I came back from the GYN and was told that I probably had a thyroid condition (in addition to being worried about the whole Dick Stress issue); I came home distraught ya'll. Bawling and the whole 9. I hadn't been reading my Bible regularly like I used to/should have been, but there in the face of a problem I ran to it.

I forget which passage I turned to, but the heading was "Do Not Worry". I read it, and then wrote out my prayers in my prayer book. When I turned back to read it again, I saw that it wasn't on that page anymore. I don't remember turning the page either, but I flipped back and found it. I understand that God was giving me a message; not to worry, and that everything was going to be fine. He said it, and I'm listening.

Amen.

So other than that, I'm still Monie. Still silly, crazy, expressing myself to the nth and learning and growing along life's journey.

To all my new readers, thank you for joining! I'm still checking you all out. I'm still in amazement that I started this blog the day after Christmas '08 and its got 128 readers since then.

Hopefully when I turn this mafucka' into a book ya'll will buy it :D

And before I leave you...

How much do I love Showtime on Demand for FINALLY putting "Why Did I Get Married?" on demand. That means I get to see Michael Jai White's sexy body whenever I want; rewind the shit, and just ooh chile. Look at 'im:

don't you just wanna put your arms under his and grab him all up on top of his shoulders, and thrust? Woooo chile! hehehee

besoskiddies!

monie